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Senior Wheels
Center upgrades transport

“Don’t get me wrong,” said a smiling senior center regular, “I like the little bus just fine. But those ultra plush calf leather heated seats and my tired bones are new best friends. And I think the driver looks great in his Armani suit.”

“Now I actually LIKE going to the doctor,” said another appreciative octogenarian. “Between the mood lighting, Dean Martin on the 36 speaker stereo and full wet bar, my blood pressure is down 10 points by the time I get there.”

The normally under-the-radar senior center surprised the community recently when it purchased a pearl white stretch limousine from a Las Vegas company called Naughty Wheels. Apparently someone counted up proceeds from rummage sales and discovered close to $150,000 in the coffee cans.

“We were actually leaning toward a hot tub and filet mignon Fridays”, said a center representative, “until someone noticed this great deal on Craigs list. The seller wanted to cut costs by moving to smaller vehicles, so we got the 30 footer for a song.”

“I admit,” said a satisfied rider, “its a long walk from the door to the back seat, but it’s worth it. Even better is being able to hang on to your walker while you stick your head through the moonroof and scream whooooopeeeee!!”

Many at the center are now trying to think of reasons to go more places in the new ride.

“Heck,” said one chuckling elder, “we don’t even have to get out. It’s as much fun to just sit someplace behind the tinted windows, watching everyone try to peer in to see who the big shots are.”


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